Friend Friday: Comments and criticism

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This week we are discussing comments and criticism. It’s something we’ve all had to deal with, whether in real life or during the course of our blog writing careers. Someone is always going to judge and try to push across their opinion. We just have to decide what to do with it.

1. Do you allow comments on your blog? Why or why not?
Yes. I find that with the exception of a few negative comments, usually the comments I receive are kind or constructive in some way.

2. Do you think at times people leave comments that are insincere or not well thought out? What’s the point?
Oh yes, all the time. Although, not necessarily on my blog, but I’ll go to someone else’s blog and I’ll see a comment like “Great outfit. Visit my blog http://www.crappyurlcrap.com” and it irritates me. Yes, I understand you’re trying to make connections, but when it shows that you didn’t read the post, it irritates me (as I’m sure it does to others). I’ve also received a few comments that are definitely backhanded compliments, but that doesn’t really have to do with this question…

3. Would you ever leave a comment that could be considered negative?
I have (kinda). It goes along with #5, but there was a blogger who turned off her comments for a few months. Before she turned them off, she explained why (she was getting LOTS of negative comments), and I left her a comment telling her to snap out of it. She’s a pretty girl with a successful blog. There are going to be haters, and those were the people TRYING to shut down her comments. I basically wrote that she needed to ignore them, as much as it hurts, and try to ignore it because they’re trying to get under her skin.
So, it wasn’t making fun of her, it was basically telling her to grow a pair. I wasn’t meaning to be rude, didn’t write anything rude, BUT, I am not her. I don’t know how she felt reading my comment, so maybe, just MAYBE, it could’ve made her mad.

I have, on occasion, thought “wow, that top does NOT fit” or that a certain shade wasn’t very flattering. But, I never wrote it as a comment because I am viewing the outfit through a photo. The lighting may not show the color as it really appears IRL. And, if the top doesn’t fit, I’m sure the woman wearing it is aware. Maybe they just love the shirt/dress/thing and really want to wear it. Again, I don’t know. It’s one of those opinions that I have that I keep to myself, because I’m sure people have thought the same thing about me. If a skirt wrinkles the wrong way on me, it looks like I shouldn’t be wearing it. I wouldn’t want someone to tell me I look terrible, so I don’t tell anyone else that.

4. Most people claim to like constructive criticism. Do you really and how do you offer that kind of criticism to others?
I don’t mind constructive criticism. In the past week I’ve had two different people tell me that shortening a hem and wearing heels would make the outfit I was wearing look better. Did they tell me I looked stupid and needed to listen? No. They offered their suggestion in a very polite way, and I responded to each, thanking them for their opinion. Neither comment was rude or hurtful. They were intended as helpful, which I appreciate.
I do feel that there is a vast difference between constructive criticism and criticism. There is a difference in what those two ladies said and the random anonymous person telling me I’m not fashionable and my hair is bad.

5. Some bloggers don’t allow comments in order to cut down on negativity. Do you think that is the way to go or are there other ways to deal with the negative vibes?
I think Kendi’s husband said it best- don’t give the negative comments any more weight than you’d give the positive ones.
I think when you don’t allow comments you’re missing out on a big part of blogging. I’ve had WAY more positive comments in the past year than I’ve have negative ones. I feel like I get to know the people who read my blog by their comments and vice versa. When I have time, I love leaving comments because I want the bloggers I follow to know I’m reading their blogs and sometimes I like to throw in my two cents or ask a question. I’ve followed a few blogs where I couldn’t leave comments and it annoyed me. It felt like I had to jump through hoops in order to send that person feedback, which just seemed stupid to me.

As always, to see everyone else’s responses, head over to Modly Chic.

Suze

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13 thoughts on “Friend Friday: Comments and criticism

  1. Hi Hunnie…love your responses:)

    I agree….negativity gets you no where…ignore and move on:)
    I joined the Google group, just not too sure how this all works?

    Have a great weekend!

  2. I definitely think comments is a great way of blogging! I sometimes feel like it’s my daily convo with the bloggers I visit the most! I know I’ve gotten a lot of inspiration for a new blog post from the comments my readers leave!

    Great answers girl!

  3. Great words of wisdom from Kendi’s husband!

    My favorite part about being a blogger is connecting with awesome people like you that I never would have known otherwise and I think those relationships really come from comments and conversations that are spawned from comments.

    The bad comes with the good, and I agree that the blogger is the one who loses out if they close comments.

    Lovely thoughts 🙂

    xo

    • Totally! I never would’ve talked to you if it weren’t for our blogs and twitter! I think comments help create conversations, like MJ said.

  4. What Kendi’s husband said is great! I think that’s something everyone should keep in mind all the time, not just with blogging! I agree also about remembering not to leave someone a comment that you wouldn’t want to receive. I think a lot of people forget that sometimes!
    I really enjoyed reading your thoughts! 🙂
    -Tess

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  6. I agree with your answers. 🙂 There’s a big difference with constructive criticism and just criticism. Constructive criticism’s purpose is to bring out the best from what you got while criticism sometimes are just plain insults being thrown at one person just for the enjoyment of the person talking

  7. I would never have a blog if I couldn’t get comments. Blogging is more than writing, it’s also a discussion. Great post!!!

  8. Well said, especially that part about missing out on the community if you don’t allow comments. I don’t know what I would do without the encouragement and response from blogs, and I really love being able to interact with other bloggers by commenting on their blogs as well!

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